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As long as everything looks fantastic, smells fantastic and there are a couple of James Bond-style gadgets into the bargain.And the most important quote of all: ‘It still feels like a Range Rover.’ Which it does, totally. I grabbed what I needed to take to the shower, knowing that I probably slept through breakfast but keeping my fingers crossed that there’d be coffee left… I figured that I’d go ahead and deal with her now since she’s more lucid in the morning…

We can either follow the leads now and then leave after the autopsy or wait until after the autopsy to start work… ‘Help yourself.’ Next I’ll find a ‘curious little cake’ that says ‘eat me’… The medicine cabinet was stocked with floss, new tooth brushes, tooth paste, mouth wash, razors, shaving gel (male & female)…

The only issue remaining is the fact that the Velar is so good-looking, it has suddenly made even the Evoque and the Jaguar F-Pace look worryingly dated by comparison.

The antidote to which might be to focus on the price tags instead, in which case, one could argue, beauty has proven once again to be only skin deep and exponentially more expensive.

I cannot believe this car arrived the week after I declared the current fad for in-car touch screens a mortal threat to the human race.

I promise, this is the last time I will go there but ordinary motorists simply cannot cope with the concept of touch and drive, without unconsciously drifting into other driver’s territory.

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